I am nearing the end of my PhD journey – just two months to go! – and as a result I have had quite a few decisions to make about what on earth I’m going to do afterwards. While I would love someone to come along and simply tell me what I’ll be doing and direct my life, I am an adult now (I think) and so I am the one making these decisions.
So, in an attempt to take some action I applied for two lecturing positions at two different universities. To be honest I wasn’t even really sure I wanted them and part of me probably felt like I should be doing this but I applied anyway thinking “Well what is there to lose?”
In the lead up I had all manner of fears lurking and shouting things quite loudly in my ear like:
“You are making a choice now, there’s no turning back”
“What if you get it?”
“What if you don’t get it?”
The overriding fear was that I had to make a decision between my business and academia.
Whenever I am in the grips of fear, too scared to step out of my comfort zone and take a risk, I am reminded of a story told by one of my favourite mindfulness teachers, Tara Brach (this was taken from her blog, you can read the whole post here):
After the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks, as many people feared an ongoing and vicious spiral of retaliation and global violence, a wonderful and well-known Cherokee legend went viral on the Internet: An old grandfather is speaking to his grandson about what causes the violence and cruelty in the world. “In each human heart,” he tells the boy, “there are two wolves battling one another—one is fearful and angry, and the other is understanding and kind.” The young boy then asks, “Which one will win?” His grandfather smiles and says, “Whichever one we choose to feed.”
The funny thing is, I didn’t even get an interview.
You might expect me to tell you that I was hugely disappointed and I’m sure some people would be.
For me there was very little. Sure it hurt my ego a little bit to think there were other people they would rather see than me. Mainly though I just had an assurance that it wasn’t meant to be because I didn’t want to be lecturing full-time at a university anyway. But I didn’t know this until after I had applied.
I had to go through the process in order to see what I wanted clearly.
In going through the process and moving with the fear, rather than away from it, it reminded me of what I love doing: helping people master their mindset and make fear their super power and researching juicy topics. That is what I love and that is what I excel at.
Instead of giving me a sense of rejection or sadness it gave me a renewed energy and focus on the things I love.
What if you moved toward fear, rather than away from it?
From a very early age we learn how to put one foot in front of the other. It is simple and moves us forward in directions we are free to choose. Gradually, over time, we begin to fear situations and with the fear comes all manner of thoughts, behaviours and habits.
This comes in the form of procrastination and perfectionism and is all wrapped up in an illusion of comfort.
If you let it, fear will weave its way into the fabric of your life and prevent you from taking the next step forward. It arises as a way to keep you safe, but it also prevents you from moving beyond your comfort zone and exploring the unknown.
There are two options
You can choose to listen to this, and become paralysed and locked in familiarity, or you can break it down into baby steps and inch your way forward.
The best way I know how to do this is to have a team around you urging you on and to work with someone to identify those fears and behaviours and to work out the best and most efficient way forward.
That’s why today I am inviting you to join me in a free strategy session all about unraveling your fears and making them your superpower. We will:
- Explore those big dreams and desires you have,
- Identify the fears that might be keeping you stuck, and
- Work out a plan for moving you forward.
Sarah Dee, the founder of Dee Street, is a past client and here is what she had to say:
“I started working with Tess as my coach to help with launching my start up. I didn’t want to do another dry business course and I had the feeling I needed to cut through some blockages that were stopping me from embracing my new path and learning new systems. In a gentle yet direct way, Tess helped move me forward on both sides. She not only helped me set up solid systems in various areas of my business but also helped me work through fears and other issues that were stopping me from really going for it. My mindset changed, as did my relationship to fear, money and self worth and I am currently running a successful business in a balanced and enjoyable way day to day.”
I love helping women like you to make fear their super power and leap into their power.
If you are ready to begin this journey then click the link below and book in a time for your free strategy session with me.
p.s. if no times suit then just reply to this message and we can arrange a time that fits.
BOOK YOUR FREE STRATEGY SESSION NOW
About the author: Tess Bartlett is the Founder of This Simple Space and a mindset mastery coach based in Northcote, Melbourne. She works in person and over skype with high-achieving conscious female entrepreneurs using mindset, visualisation and strategy to help them take the big leap and move to the next phase of their business so they can step into their power using. She also offers research consultancy and workshops.
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